Comment of the Week
On this post, Anonymous has this to say:
"In America when we can't solve a problem we try to make the world to accept the problem with words like 'It's not too bad'. Or sometimes we even protest against the solution of the problem. For example, in the SF Bay Area, a few years ago, a group of overweight people called the press and TV media to a celebration of 'fat is beautiful, let's not fight it' and staged dances to show how the world would be if we all let our bodies go. I am overweight and I didn't like it a bit. First I laughed, it was funny, for a while, than it was sad. The desperation for acceptance sometimes makes us look pathetic. I've lost a few pounds, since."
I'm not posting this to pick a fight with you, Anonymous! But I disagree with you. I don't think it's "desperation" that makes us want overweight people to be treated with respect, and I don't think we're "pathetic" for having a problem with the way fat is demonized and the way fat people are stereotyped and discriminated against.
Some of us are happy with our overweight bodies, some aren't. I personally am, right now, not particularly happy with my weight. But my personal ideal weight might still be something that society would look at as disgusting, unacceptable, etc. Or even laughable, as you put it.
Someone who's overweight, whatever their personal story may be, whether they've lost or gained a hundred pounds to get there, is still subject to all the disdain and mockery and fat horror of the world. And that attitude is what needs to change, no matter what our individual weight or weight loss issues may be.
"In America when we can't solve a problem we try to make the world to accept the problem with words like 'It's not too bad'. Or sometimes we even protest against the solution of the problem. For example, in the SF Bay Area, a few years ago, a group of overweight people called the press and TV media to a celebration of 'fat is beautiful, let's not fight it' and staged dances to show how the world would be if we all let our bodies go. I am overweight and I didn't like it a bit. First I laughed, it was funny, for a while, than it was sad. The desperation for acceptance sometimes makes us look pathetic. I've lost a few pounds, since."
I'm not posting this to pick a fight with you, Anonymous! But I disagree with you. I don't think it's "desperation" that makes us want overweight people to be treated with respect, and I don't think we're "pathetic" for having a problem with the way fat is demonized and the way fat people are stereotyped and discriminated against.
Some of us are happy with our overweight bodies, some aren't. I personally am, right now, not particularly happy with my weight. But my personal ideal weight might still be something that society would look at as disgusting, unacceptable, etc. Or even laughable, as you put it.
Someone who's overweight, whatever their personal story may be, whether they've lost or gained a hundred pounds to get there, is still subject to all the disdain and mockery and fat horror of the world. And that attitude is what needs to change, no matter what our individual weight or weight loss issues may be.
posted by mo pie at 8:00 AM
5 Comments:
Many of the "fat acceptance" sites I've seen aren't really about acceptance. True acceptance is no more about pride than it is about shame. If someone is judging you by the contents of your character rather than by the shape of your skin, your weight, be it 120 lbs. or 320 lbs, should be a matter of indifference to them (and Lord knows it's none of their business). In a perfect world, no one would be either proud or ashamed of their weight.
I agree with the above comment. I am, in official terms, overweight, but the thought of joining fat acceptance groups I find a bit weird. It's like the fat acceptance book that stated categorically that all skinny people are mean, and bad in bed to bood. We're all just people.
Saying that, I do like reading other peoples thoughts on the issue, so Go, Mo, Go!
I agree totally that we are all people and worthy of respect, whether we are fat, thin, black, white, jewish, christian, hetero, homo or whatever. And whether we are any of those things shouldn't matter to anyone else, it should be who we are, not what we are that matters ... in a perfect world.
But society isn't perfect. In days gone by, church attendance was virtually compulsory, and woe betide the person who didn't go. Homosexuality was illegal not that long ago. Do I have to mention slavery? Fat people are often discriminated against in society, and they are pressured into feeling humiliated and guilty because of their weight. Maybe having a role model who is visibly proud of her body, of whatever weight, will help some people shed those negative feelings.
Besides, it's hardly a crime is it? It doesn't hurt anyone.
I'm not sure what I think about this.
Certainly, I think we should all be able to love ourselves the way we are. But that would have to have the corollary that if we want to change the way we are, we shouldn't be criticised for that, either.
It is obviously better to lose weight than be miserable about it but do nothing about it. On the other hand, that must be the person in question's own decision, not because they are being badgered about it by society/family/peer group.
Sometimes I wish that it was universally considered rude to comment on anyone else's body. Even "You look lovely today." Another reason I like the internet: everyone's beautiful online.
I am 21 and I am overweight. I have been overweight my whole life. I got picked on from Elementary school through high school. I just want people to know that we are just like anybody else. We have feelings too, and we do get hurt by what people say about us being overweight.
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